life happens

Hi,

It’s the second week of October and my eating habits have been messy. After I came back from camp, I wanted to snack on anything, especially at night time. I tried to fight that habit, it’s been really hard but cheers to overcoming things.

I came here because I wanted to be grateful again. I don’t know about you but God has been good to me. Earth is a planet and honestly there have been times when the impossible became possible and the possible became impossible. The world is large, strange and crazy.

This month, I have unconsciously been so focused on my self awareness, on getting better for myself, my kids, my journey and for those ill encounter in my journey. This past few weeks I have fought every thought that fought against me trying and I won. I have fought against my head and I am slowly getting better. There are some thoughts I still have to tackle, especially the ones that wouldn’t let me stretch/yoga.

One thing I have been learning so far is that whatever dream or prayer we have, it’s always a vision of our journey. Me right now is a prayer I had a few years ago.

I have chosen to see life as a journey that happens in chapters, or let me say eras, an era that does not define our lives. I have chosen to be very much myself and to tap into me, because all I have and want I already have.

I am writing this to God and to the host of angels that control the universe that I am willing and ready to tap into myself fully. I am saying this because I know how hurtful, hard and exhausting the journey can be but I am willing to live, make mistakes, cry and live again.

Life isn’t for those who aren’t strong, anyone that has ever lived is a hero, a hero because they had the opportunity to give their souls life on earth.

This month, two complete strangers told me I was kind and prayed for me. I went out with a friend and when I ordered a bolt. In my attempt to practice what I have been willing to learn which was gentleness, softness, calm and ease, I spoke to the driver with so much care and kindness. While we were in the car he told me I was very kind and that made me happy. I realised it was something I needed to attribute.

Some days later I was having such a terrible day, I had to address an issue but for some crazy reason I was very calm and gentle. I was surprised but I liked the energy I was using to approach life.

Lately, I often put people in their place as people and I am learning to just let everyone be themselves. I am an observer right now. I have chosen that in this era I'll be completely unproblematic, stay away from problematic situations without hate, situations that I have to fight for more than my feminine energy can afford to.

Allow it sink that I am a sexy baby girl, embrace my strong sexual sense, understand that not everyone would like me and that's fine, understand that some clicks aren’t for me, understand that my love for myself determines how I view myself in people’s thoughts, allow myself to be chased and pampered, not afraid to show off myself because I am beautiful, have good sex, do my make up, smile more, walk confidently and unbothered about who keeps staring at my ass, enjoy my unique journey, respect my unique journey, appreciate my life and just love everything about me.

I want you all to understand that it is hard to love yourself if you grew up like me. I have grown to love those who traumatized me so that I can move on with my life and honestly there is nothing stopping me from being the best version of me right now.

I hope you all have been doing ok.

Peace and love.