Love is a verb not a feeling…
God wants us as christians to love others just the way he loves us. He knows we aren’t perfect but he says that when we follow him, we are a step closer to perfection. According to 1 John 4:7–21, The Bible talks about how God is love and if as christians we don’t know love, we automatically do not know God.
The kind of love God talks about is his exact effortless, forgiving, nonjudgmental… kind of love. The Bible explains this love by talking about the death of jesus. God loved us so much that he sent his son Jesus to die for us so we can communicate freely with him. We are filled with sin but Jesus’ death on the cross gives us hope of heaven.
In the spirit of valentine, my church brought a guest speaker on Sunday to speak to us about love, marriage and relationships. It was enlightening. I learnt a lot about how God’s love is enough for us to share with others. Imagine growing up in a family filled with love. Love would be a character. When you become born again, you are automatically part of God’s body (Family) which is the church and because God is love, we radiate his love to the world effortlessly.
At the end of the sermon, I realised I was so empty. I used to think I was the most loving person until last sunday. I realised I was suffering from a condition called low in love. ( a self diagnoses) As Christains, we are taught to love others regardless of how much they treat us. God isn’t saying don’t have boundaries but, don’t ever get tired of helping someone regardless of what they do, say or how they react. Love should be a character trait.
I am trying to find the right way to explain without going in circles. According to John 13:34, “…you love one another: just as I have loved you, you also love one another”. The way God loves us is from a place of perfection. He loves us, we sin, he forgives and he keeps loving us. We curse him and blame him and neglect him, we focus on the world and he still protects us. We seek him only when we are selfishly in need and he still opens doors for us. He still blesses us. That’s perfection. No human can love like God.
During the sermon, Pastor Tunde Wada likened God’s love to the love of a mother. Protective, kind, provides the best quality of things to her children in her best capacity, shows up, is sensitive, and wants the best for her children.
God wants us to love our neighbours, our landlords, our annoying friends just like a mother loves their child. Just like he effortlessly loves us. We should want the best for them just like a mother would and we should treat them just like we would treat ourselves. (Matt 22:39) Most importantly not because they deserve it but because God expects his Children (Christains) to be that way, just like him.
As much as I know that’s amazing, I also do not have enough love in my heart for myself to even give out to others. Although achievable, I believe that no human can love the way God loves. I know the basic idea of Christianity is love, and for me to acquire that, I need to study God’s word, Listen to him and consistently practise his will so that I can move closer towards perfection but I am saddened by my acclaimed diagnosis of lack of love.
Because of this, I am hard on myself when I get angry at people for not giving me my applause when I do any form of good, when things are not reciprocated as I would expect them to, I get mad about being angry because God wants us to love without seeking anything in return. I continually tell myself. “I am supposed to be filled with love”! But oh well… I still have a long way to learn and patience to do so.
I guess what I have learnt so far is that being a christian really points out my flaws as a human which is both good and bad. Good because I keep realising there is so much character development I need to go through and deserve for my growth and wellbeing and bad because I keep realising I have a lot of flaws and a lot of circles to unlearn.
It’s not just about love for others, it’s also about love for one self and the freedom of just being without guilt and struggle. I have to love myself enough to give love to others. I have to practise this love for myself so I can project what I possess onto others. Not because of them but because I am a christian. Because that’s the character I should possess. Not because I have to reciprocate a certain energy.
Prayerfully, I pray that I can figure this love thing out. Fill up my empty heart and bless those around me. Until then, happy Valentine!
